the termination experience

Unexpected.Unnotified.Unexplainable.

Grabeeee… kakaiba talaga pinagdaanan ko last week. I’ll give you a brief flashback. Here it goes:

I didn’t expect that March 31, 2010 will be my last day of duty at AGH. It was really a mind-boggling experience for me. I still have a schedule for the month of April last March 29, 2010. Then I don’t know why on the next day I can’t find my name on the schedule. It was changed.
I was terminated.

In tagalong-natanggal,dinispatya,pinatalsik.. And what made my heart sank was the fact that I’m not aware what was my mistake. I went home with a heavy heart but God impressed me with three verses on my devotion and it was very timely.

“The person who loves God is the one God knows and cares for."

-1 Corinthians 8:3

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.”

-1 Peter 5:7

"You need to remain calm; the Lord will fight for you."

-Ex. 14:14

Then I wrote my resignation letter, I cried. Before the ink can reach the white paper, tears keep falling from my eyes.

Even if you've fallen, even if you've failed, even if everyone else has rejected you, Christ will not turn away from you. :)

Then I headed for my last duty. I received words of encouragement and support from my colleagues. We reminisced the good old duty days and what they heard why all of a sudden I’m out of the list. My colleagues have no complaints against me and that’s why I really can’t understand why all of a sudden I was removed. “They owe you an explanation!!!” as one resident doctor said. He adds, “kaya nga ako tumagal dito kasi sa samahan..” Exactly! That was also my reason why I stayed. I will always treasure the memories and the friendship I have found.

I thanked God for this heart-warming message from my sister:

sissy..take heart..baka your getting comfortable na sa kasi sa AGH..eh iba n plans sa iyo ng Lord..di ba we are praying for better opportunity for you...I'm thinking baka possible yan na ang answer ng Lord...pra mas magsipag ka na to look for a new job..Ung mga friends mo naman will still be there for u kahit ala ka na sa AGH..diba friends for keeps sila..diba sabi...all things work for the best for those who love Christ ;)

I got a phone call from my head nurse. I asked for the primary reason then she answered “hindi ka kasi feel ni ****!” Ang babaw ng reason, right? My head nurse can’t do anything because it’s the management’s decision. But it’s not important to me anymore for God allowed this to happen because He has a purpose. I think it’s better left unsaid. I was also reminded by the bible character named Joseph the dreamer.
He experienced persecutions from his own brothers but he ended up victorious. For the complete story, read Genesis Chapter 37 onwards. His story was very inspiring that we must cling to our faith in all circumstances of our life. Like Joseph, we can also dream great dreams and live up to our fullest potential. The whole termination experience showed me how faithful God is. I thank God for His word
 and He also used people to encourage me. :)

I cried. I prayed. I forgave.

Bless those who persecute you; bless, and don’t curse.

-Romans 12:14

Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord.

-Romans 12:19

I’m sOooooo excited to the next mission field that God will assign for me. Praise God! :)

my little friend :D

Meet my little friend-Sheayen. We called her ayen. She and her family lives besides our house and our house is like her extended home. She is like my own little sister and my parents treated her like their own grandchild. How time really flies! I can’t believe that she just turned four this year. We saw her growing up and she amazes us today the way she thinks and reasons. Just like other bibo kids, she always showcases her talents to our family. Besides of singing and dancing, she looooooves to eat! She is part of the samahang bata-na-napagiwanan-sa-kusina. hahahah. This kid really brings joy and laughter to our house.

And this is what we do when boredom strikes…

I do love kids. And no doubt that my future ministry will involve kids! :)

Jesus said, "Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these."-Matthew 19:14

"I am a Christian"

When I say I am a Christian — by Maya Angelou

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I'm not shouting "I'm clean livin'."
I'm whispering "I was lost,
Now I'm found and forgiven."

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I don't speak of this with pride.
I'm confessing that I stumble
and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I'm not trying to be strong.
I'm professing that I'm weak
And need His strength to carry on.

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I'm not bragging of success.
I'm admitting I have failed
And need God to clean my mess.

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I'm not claiming to be perfect,
My flaws are far too visible
But, God believes I am worth it.

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I still feel the sting of pain.
I have my share of heartaches
So I call upon His name.

When I say ... "I am a Christian"
I'm not holier than thou,
I'm just a simple sinner
Who received God's good grace, somehow

woman's stuff O_o

I received this forwarded email from a sister-in-Christ. :)
Thanks cess for sharing this one!

What makes me weak? My fears.....

What makes me whole? My God.

What keeps me standing? My faith.

What makes me compassionate? My selflessness.

What makes me honest? My integrity.

What sustains my mind? My quest for knowledge.

What teaches me all lessons? My mistakes.

What lift's my head high? My pride, not arrogance.

What if I can't go on? Not an option.

What makes me victorious? My courage to climb.

What makes me competent? My confidence .

What makes me sensual? My insatiable essence.

What makes me beautiful? My everything.

What makes me a woman? My heart .

Who says I need love? I do.

What empowers me? My God & Me.

Who am I? I AM A PROUD WOMAN!

For all the ladies out there, STAY BEAUTIFUL inside and out! :)

Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. -Proverbs 31:30

for God's glory!

Whew! It’s been almost 4 months since I worked as a volunteer nurse at a 35-bed capacity hospital near our village. I still vividly remember that one year ago I’ve been busy preparing for my board exam. I really missed those days where life was not as complicated compare today. There were a lot of people who asked me why I took up Nursing. They asked this question a hundred times since this course is really popular. To be honest, I really don’t know. Today, it is still in demand but not on my own country. If you will answer to the question why you took up nursing because of humanitarian purposes, people would not believe in you. Oh well, I can’t blame them if they perceive nurses as servants after money.

Hospitals today required us to be trained as a volunteer nurse before you can become a staff nurse and some of them have training fees. Because of the “backer” system here in the Philippines and the tremendous supply of nurses, it’s really tough to get a job at the hospitals even volunteer jobs. That’s the reason why many of them pursue jobs at the call center industry. It’s frustrating, right? *sigh*

I thought that after receiving my college diploma and get my license, everything will turn out good. But there is really no easy way in climbing the peak of the mountain. There are a lot of rocky roads that registered nurses have to face including me! Here are some: No income as a volunteer nurse (free meal only or none at all for some hospitals), there are a lot of seminars and training required for us to attend before applying in a hospital (so what for is our 4-yrs stay in college?..hmp!), no assurance to be hired as a staff nurse (not until someone will resign or you have a backer) and so on and so forth. But God comforted me with His words found at Psalm 46:10—Be still, and know that I am God.

In the middle of trials, I have two options as what my senior pastor used to say. It’s either to be bitter or better. So I chose to be BETTER. My experiences today in the hospital is still a blessing indeed. I just want to enjoy every moment as a nurse and be the nurse that God wants me to be. :)

I summed up the things I gained…


*experiences
-first time to have a graveyard duty (11pm to 7am)
-straight duty (graveyard till the morning shift)
-cute little angels at the ward (pedia patients.. some were uber duper naughty and I remember that one boy used to call me “monkey girl!”.. err :l toxic ang swero nila kasi galaw sila ng galaw but still they are precious kids)
-PGH patients (please go home patients :)) bantay sarado baka makatakas, d pa bayad..haha)
-dead-on-arrival cases (DOA) at the ER (it helps me to appreciate my life more and other lives as well. And it’s a constant reminder from God that I need to share His love and grace to others before its too late)
-emergency and a not-so emergency cases (nerve-wracking..hahah!)
-a sincere smile and simple “thank you” from my patients and their relatives (it really makes my duty worth it)
-demanding patients or their companions (yay! it helps me to become more patient..hehe)


*skills (somehow)
-prioritization
-hmm.. i don’t want to include medical terms here but I’m pretty sure that I’m more confident now in dealing with my patients compare when I was a student nurse.


*FRIENDS
-IRclub
-bonding moments
-laugh/food trips
-pictorial sessions




My realizations these days:
**God is my backer . I know that in His time, I’ll be able to work in another hospital that will provide me an opportunity to grow in my field and will offer a good compensation.
**God is my boss. BAWAL TAMAD! Haha :)

So whatever is happening in my career, I want to use it FOR GOD’S GLORY!

Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart.
-Psalm 37:4
"My thoughts are not your thoughts, nor are your ways My ways,' says the Lord.'For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are My ways higher than your ways,And My thoughts than your thoughts."
-Isaiah 55:8-9

i'm God's princess :)

"Do not stir up nor awaken love until it pleases."
-Song of Songs 8:4

hmm.. I can't sleep. Dunno why.. it is because of the incident happened at the church or the story told by my friend?

I keep reminding myself nowadays that if it is God's will, it will happen! :)
My heart's prayer is that God will give me the patience to wait for my God's best and He will give me wisdom to counsel my friend/s regarding heart issues. By His Spirit, I will know what to say and what not to say.

I'm currently reading "What to do until love finds you". I'll promise that I will share the highlights of this book at my blogs. It will be coming soon.. hehe. Allow me to finish it before the month ends. ukie?!:)

I'm God's PRINCESS.
I'm His child.
I'll keep trusting Him for my PRINCE. :)

Love God, Love People

It hurts.. I don't know why there are some people as if they existed just to pull you down, down and down.. and they'll never stop hurting you. But you know what hurts more? If those people are the people you're really close with.

People will hurt, annoy and disappoint you in some point of our lives. But whenever I think of God's grace, I realized that these people needs grace too. Grace is God showing His love to you even though you don't deserve it.

Aside from the physical wounds, God can heal heartaches.
He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.
—Psalm 147:3

I can't change them but God can. What I can do is to show them the love and grace that I have received from Him.

But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you (Luke 6:27-28).

What if you're enemies didn't apologize?

Let us follow Jesus' example: Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing (Luke 23:34).

And let us not be carried away by our emotions easily because maybe we just misinterpret that person too. That person might be on a personal crisis, exhausted, busy and distracted. These past few days, I can say that I'm getting 'manhid' na because what my friend finds offending from someone else's words that was being thrown to me.. deadma lang sa akin..d ko na kasi pansin e..hehe.. :D

The reason behind it...
Love God, Love People.
It's love month anyway. :)
But even if its not the season of hearts,lets love in every season. ("v")